the fart pool

A Quiet Evening at home:

Things went well tonight. Dookie actually ate her dinner.  Granted it was with "snippers" (bbq tongs) instead of a fork, and half a bottle of ketchup, but baby steps people.

 Then after dinner, it was time for a bath. They were having fun, playing with their bath toys and each other. Then out of the blue, Baby Sis lets out a huge fart that reverberated against the bottom of the bath tub. Baby Sis starts laughing as the bubbles pop out of the water.  Dookie, says, "Hey, it's bubbles, like a hot pool (tub)! Fart again! We'll have a fart pool party!"

tiny tea party

We had a tea party in the playroom today. Dookie was the host; Baby Sis and myself were the guests.

Dookie: "Momma I made you tea!"
I pretend to drink the tea.
Dookie: "It was spit up."
Momma: "Thanks."

I'd hate to find out what the "Chocolate tea" is....

Meet Dookie!

Friends have been telling me to do it for months, and I'm finally doing it. I can't resist any longer. I'm creating a blog about the hysterical things that come out of my daughter's mouth or happen in my home.  Shit like this deserves to be shared with the world. Hopefully this blog will entertain you as much as it does me.

Welcome to "Teeny Tiny Poopie Head." Which, apparently, is the FUNNIEST insult EVER.  Dookie says it and nearly pisses her pants in laughter every time. Typically when someone is a poopie head, I would tend to think they'd be a HUGE poopie head, but no, Teeny Tiny poopie head is soooooo much worse.

This is my Dookie.  She's three and is awesome. Why Dookie? Who, in their right mind, calls their kid something associated with feces?! Well, it's a (small) step up from my nickname, Pookie. Which my Pop gave me as a baby. Why? Well, obviously because I "pooped and puked at the same time." Yep. Almost 27 years of Pookie going strong. People always ask, and Pop LOVES to tell them why he calls me Pookie. Nothing like a fresh smattering of embarrassment to toughen you up.
So, when my little clone was born, she was Pookie 2, but that got too confusing and Pop started calling her Dookie. And there you have it....destined to poop. a lot.

In fact, her newest obsession is calling you in when she's taking a dump. This is an actual conversation between Dookie and Daddy yesterday:

Dookie: (in a sing song voice) "Daaaaddy come here, I want you."
He goes to her in the bathroom.
Daddy: "Yes, baby?"
Dookie:" Hahhahahah, I made you smell my poooo-op. I stunk it up in here!"
Daddy: "That's nasty."
Dookie: "No, it's natural."

Seriously. Where the hell does she come up with these things? I'm not certain but, I have my suspicions....she's got 4 Uncles that teach her lots of terrible awesome things, and something tells me that her sicko father has a lot to do with it.  I'm fairly certain the "it's natural" part came from my Pop.

So today, while in her "office." She tried to lure Daddy in again.

Dookie: "Daaaaaaaaaaddy. May I please ask you a question?" (This is her newest thing that Pop taught her because she interrupts you every two seconds of life. So now, she repeats this sentence every. two. seconds.)
Daddy: "What is it, baby?"
Dookie: "Come in here, pleeeeeease?"
Daddy: Sighs. Goes to the bathroom. "Yes?"
Dookie: "I stunk it up again, it's horse poo-poo. BWAHAHHAHHAHAHAHA" (Her laugh is sinister)



....And so begins the adventures of my teeny tiny poopie head!